(no subject)

New update at LongHairedWeirdo about the UCLA alumni organization that's offering money for proof of bias in professors. Let's just say I started skimming their 'hit list' and have been wildly unimpressed.

(no subject)

New update at LongHairedWeirdo about the UCLA alumni organization that's offering money for proof of bias in professors. Let's just say I started skimming their 'hit list' and have been wildly unimpressed.

I'm going to hell for this, aren't I?

J:"Hello?"
(3-5 second pause)
TS:"Hello?"
J: "Hello!"
TS: "Is this John Palmer?"
J: "Who's asking and what's you're business?"
TS: "We're (nameless company) and we're opening up a branch in Seattle"
J: "I'm so very happy for you; economic expansion benefits us all!"
TS: "We would like to give you $300 in gift certificates for this."
J: "Well... I don't know if that's a good idea."
TS: "Don't you want it?"
J: "Well... You're planning to kill me, aren't you?"
TS: (pause)
J: "I've seen your cars following me around and the black helicopters you send when I've evaded the cars! You're trying to kill me, right?"
TS: (slightly more weirded out pause)
J: "This is a setup, right? Lure me in with $300, and the *bang!*, shoot me in the head and leave me dead in a ditch! Would it be too much to ask to kill me in the privacy of my own bedroom? Of course it would be! Dead in a ditch! That's your way, isn't it?"
TS: (pause that can only mean "what the *fuck* is going on here?")
J: "Well, you'd better not try it! I have super powers, you know!"
At this point, the phone gets picked up by TS's supervisor.

Alas, if only I knew that my phone call hadn't been "monitored or recorded for quality assurance purposes", I'd have immediately started talking normally. "A problem? What are you talking about a problem? I was asking him about your business model, and where the store was planning to open, and then he just stopped talking to me!"

I suppose, for the common good, I should get my phone on the "do not call" list ASAP... or at least not answer my phone when I'm in a very strange mood.

I'm going to hell for this, aren't I?

J:"Hello?"
(3-5 second pause)
TS:"Hello?"
J: "Hello!"
TS: "Is this John Palmer?"
J: "Who's asking and what's you're business?"
TS: "We're (nameless company) and we're opening up a branch in Seattle"
J: "I'm so very happy for you; economic expansion benefits us all!"
TS: "We would like to give you $300 in gift certificates for this."
J: "Well... I don't know if that's a good idea."
TS: "Don't you want it?"
J: "Well... You're planning to kill me, aren't you?"
TS: (pause)
J: "I've seen your cars following me around and the black helicopters you send when I've evaded the cars! You're trying to kill me, right?"
TS: (slightly more weirded out pause)
J: "This is a setup, right? Lure me in with $300, and the *bang!*, shoot me in the head and leave me dead in a ditch! Would it be too much to ask to kill me in the privacy of my own bedroom? Of course it would be! Dead in a ditch! That's your way, isn't it?"
TS: (pause that can only mean "what the *fuck* is going on here?")
J: "Well, you'd better not try it! I have super powers, you know!"
At this point, the phone gets picked up by TS's supervisor.

Alas, if only I knew that my phone call hadn't been "monitored or recorded for quality assurance purposes", I'd have immediately started talking normally. "A problem? What are you talking about a problem? I was asking him about your business model, and where the store was planning to open, and then he just stopped talking to me!"

I suppose, for the common good, I should get my phone on the "do not call" list ASAP... or at least not answer my phone when I'm in a very strange mood.