Sooner or later, I'll post some non-stressy stuff...

[johnpalmer]

...but I suppose that's not going to happen today.

Skitty has a large bump behind one ear. She's lost 14 ounces in 6 weeks (and on a 6 pound kitty, that's even worse than usual).

Got her to the vet, the doctor thinks cancer is the most likely cause, and took a needle aspiration.

It could be an infection. We won't know until the labs open and analyze the sample.(Under the microscope, he saw signs of inflammation, but nothing conclusive.)

Well... while I was there, I'd decided that if he saw cancer, we weren't going to draw it out. Skitty's had a very unhappy life in some ways - I don't see any point in letting it draw out if she can't be happy and comfortable.

But the doctor said it might not be cancer. So, we gave her a shot of antibiotic. And now we wait.

And I want to grieve, and worry, but I don't have time. So, back to work.

I am once again realizing that I'm really past normal stress reactions at this point. I've cried a couple times for a few minutes, but there comes a time where it's just, like, okay, so, what can I do? Nothing. So, keep going.

I will grant that keeping busy *is* better than moping, but sometimes it makes me want to scream at the forces that are keeping me busy, because everyone deserves a little moping time, you know?

Comments

[valkyrwench.livejournal.com]

Sending good thoughts for you and Skitty.

*hugs*

[karenkay.livejournal.com]

I agree with you.

Good hopes for your Skitty kitty.

[janetmiles.livejournal.com]

Poor Skitty.

Wishing you both the best possible outcome.

[ftemery.livejournal.com]

If would be so much better if we could just schedule these things, you know? Grief, worry, nervous breakdown check, it's on my calender. I suppose all kitty knows is that her life is good now, with you.

[wordweaverlynn.livejournal.com]

Sending you warm thoughts from another stressed-out life.

[glinda-w.livejournal.com]

Oh, no. I am so sorry.

GoodThoughts...

[dubhain.livejournal.com]

Hoping very much that Skitty does not have cancer. Also glad to know that if it should come to that, you wouldn't let her suffer.

Wish I had more to offer, ATM. Wish I had the ability to make everything better.

Wishing you and Skitty very, very well.

[johnpalmer.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I've been watching her, and... well, suddenly a few things I'd noticed are making sense. I think she's losing fine motor control and can't eat any more. It's not that she's not hungry (though her hunger signals seem confused) - it's that her mouth won't quite do the right things. But she can still cuddle, and find a warm spot, and even play a bit.

That's kind of been my marker - when a cat can't be *a cat* any more, it's time to let go. When she can't play, can't find a warm spot and cuddle up and purr, and so forth, then it's time to let go. For right now, she can.

I don't think it'll be very long. But there's no need to rush.

[dubhain.livejournal.com]

Yes, exactly.

I do wish I'd waited half a day or a day more before I had Rasputin euthanized. He was suffering badly, but wasn't quite ready and I'll always regret not waiting longer. I like to think he's forgiven me for it.

That being said, I'd had to have Piper euthanized only a couple of months before, and she had definitely reached that point. He had cancer; she'd a cerebro-spinal lesion. It was a very difficult time.

Hoping Skitty recovers and gets well enough to have many more happy, purry years with you.

Be well, the both of you.